Your Purpose is Not to Be Tiny or Pretty

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Something came up for me during a conversation with a client that I wanted to riff on because I think it's something we all need to hear sometimes. 

"No matter what the point of life may be, I think we should all agree it isn't to be the most beautiful or tiny." @thefuckitdiet

Sometimes we get so lost in the insanity (yes, it is insanity) of:

  • losing that last 10lbs
  • feeling or looking leaner
  • sticking religiously to a certain food plan or diet
  • wishing our lips were fuller 
  • wishing or noses were smaller
  • wishing our cheekbones were higher
  • wishing our thighs were smaller 
  • wishing our skin was clearer
  • wishing we looked or were younger 

you get the point.... I could go on and on.. 

But when we're in our heads wishing, hoping, obsessing over these things we not only take up space that could be used for useful things, we forget that we are multi-dimensional beings of stardust that are here to fulfill amazing purposes and do rad things, like...

make babies, love each other, travel the world, hold doors open for people, hold each other, pet dogs, love cats, take care of our aging parents, teach teenagers how to be good people, cook dinner for our families, and literally so much more. 

Ladies! Let's wake up!  

  • The size of your belly doesn’t matter. 
  • The fact that your thighs rub together when you walk doesn't matter. 
  • The symmetry of your face doesn't matter. 
  • These are all just surface level stuff. 
  • Facades. 

YOU matter. 

There is nothing wrong with wanting to be healthy, our bodies want to be wholly healthy too, but when our preoccupation with these precious physical forms overrides our ability to be who we are, right now, in the moment and takes away our inner knowing that we are freaking, amazing, wondrous beings whose every breath and heartbeat is a mystery we lose the magic of everyday life. And, therefore, stop feeling the wonder of everyday life. 

You are magic. You are enough. 

Your purpose is not to be beautiful or tiny or lean or have perfect feet (or perfect anything for that matter) your job is to be you and love you. 

I love you. You're incredible. 

How to be a Grown Ass Woman

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One of my friends said to me this week, "I feel like our world is in dire need of more grown ass people."

And it got me thinking... 

I would define a "grown ass person" as follows: 
People who say what they mean. People who take real responsibility for their actions, words and the effects those actions and words have on others. Not from a place is self-defacement or berating themselves for screwing up if they do, but from a genuine desire to grow and develop and expand themselves. 

Like a real grown up. 

I'm a firm believer in treating people as if they are mature, grown-ups who, when given the correct information, can weigh the pros and cons of any certain situation, and make their own educated decisions. 

I always choose mutual respect as my default baseline interaction with anyone I come in contact with. If someone shows me that they don't reciprocate this mutual respect I can always adjust my behavior accordingly, but, for me, it always seems to work out better to give people the 'adult benefit of the doubt.'

I barely ever have experiences with bad or rude customer service. 

It's rare for me to have someone road-rage at me. 

I sign up pretty much every potential coaching client I get on a phone call with that I would like to work with.

And my track record for friendly and lovely conversations with strangers is pretty much 100%. 

I would say most the people I encounter in my life, are decent, grown-ups. 


The expectations we go into an interaction with another person with determine a huge portion of what we get in return. If we expect people to be stupid, difficult, and mean, they will most likely be that. If we expect people to hate us and treat us like shit, they probably will. 

But... the same goes for the opposite. 
If we’re honest, real and vulnerable, people will most likely be honest, real and vulnerable with us.
If we respect people and their ability to make your own choices, they will do the same for us.
If I pay my bills right away, it’s more likely my clients will pay their invoices right away.

There is a certain reciprocity that happens in every element of interaction with another person; en energetic exchange that people read off you and mirror back to you.

I think sometimes we associate being an “adult” with chronological age like somehow we just become an adult as a result of an accumulation of years. But to really “grow up” we have to fully participate in the process of learning, dealing with consequences of our actions, learning about ourselves, deciding what we value and how we want to show up, and then actually acting on those values.


I want to live in a world where the people around me act like grown ass humans, who know who they are and what they want, and make trade-offs for upholding those values. And as I let this belief and expectation be seen, I will get more of exactly that.

I am not blind. I know there is a lot of childish rhetoric going around in the media, news, and the general conversation, but I truly believe that we have to start expecting more of people. We have fallen into the expectation that people will be polarizing, combative, and unreasonable. But the truth is, we have great abilities, in ourselves, to change this, and seeing and treating other people like grown-ups is a big part of making this shift to a more reasonable world.


So let’s all treat each other with love and like the autonomous, sovereign beings, we are. Let's expect people to handle themselves gracefully and fairly, and see what happens.

What I Know for Sure

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1. I am Supported

I know that we live in a benevolent universe. I know that every single thing that happens to you, to me, to everyone is part of something that is supporting us through a journey of learning to love more deeply, more comprehensively, and more totally. 

I know shitty things happen. I know painful things happen. I know experiences and people can be unfair, overwhelming, and seemingly hopeless. But I also know that when we feel the burn of hurt, it’s the exact opportunity to give in, to crack open, to say, “I don’t know the answers,” and let ourselves be guided by this Universal support. It’s simple, but not always easy. 

2. Self-Love is the Always the Answer

Out of every single person in the world, I am the only one who knows what it feels like to be me.  I am the only person who hears how I hear, who sees how I see, who loves the way I love, who experiences sadness in my way, who understands joy the way I’m meant to. I am, was and will be, with myself. It’s the one thing I can always guarantee. If I don’t love me, I’m in a very difficult situation. 

When we put our happiness, worthiness, or valuation in someone or something else, we are saying something else matters more than our own sovereignty. When we say to ourselves consciously or unconsciously, “For me to be happy, I need him to love me,” or “I’ll really be myself when I lose these last 10 pounds,” we are literally saying someone or something else has control over how much we are worth, how much we deserve, and how much we have. 

It doesn’t matter how much love you get from other people. It doesn’t matter what your body looks like or how many pretty, awesome, expensive things you have. If you don’t love yourself, it’s all just a guise, a false front. Self-love, loving ourselves honestly and fully, is the key to having a fulfilling life. It’s the key to everything I care about and want to care about. 

3. I am Responsible for EVERYTHING that Happens to Me

(See last week’s blog post about the differences between responsibility, fault, and blame for more clarification.)

This is the most empowering statement I can think of. Living in this space is the space where miracles happen. It is where we take control of our lives, our fates, and our happiness. 

People always rally against this idea though.They want to say, “but what about when my husband cheated on me?” or “what about when my dad died in a car wreck?” Yes, these awful things happen, and they hurt and they are not your fault. But you do get to decide what you do with it. You do get to decide how you react. You do get to decide how you see what’s left after the bomb drops. 

4. Where There is Fear There is Power (or Real Vulnerability Makes Us Invulnerable)

This will be it’s own blog post someday I’m sure. But I know that true power lies in being exactly who you are. Being exactly who you are means no hiding, no pretending, and no covering up. The paradox is that only when we become completely vulnerable, do we become invulnerable because there is nothing else to figure out. Every place we feel fear it’s because there is a part of ourselves we haven’t totally integrated. As we become a fully integrated, self-realized human being, we realize we held the power all along. 

 

We are bigger, braver and kinder than we could ever imagine. Remember that. 

 

Only Love, 

 

Clara 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Blame, Fault & Responsibility

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This past week I listened to Mark Manson's book "The Subtle Art of Not Giving a Fuck," and this book is GOOOOOODDDD. Read it. Listen to it. You won't be sorry, especially if you're struggling with something that you're not quite sure how to move through. 

One of the concepts that created an "aha moment" for me was the distinction he made between Blame, Responsibility, and Fault. I've known for a long time that taking responsibility for our lives and our experiences is THE cornerstone of personal development. It's the lesson we have to learn over and over again. But it always feels a little insensitive to tell someone who has just had something incredibly traumatic happen to them or has a big painful mess in their life their dealing with that they need to "take responsibility". It just always seems a little asshole-y, and I don't want to be an asshole. 

I'm almost always for 'telling it like it is' with compassion. I'm not afraid to make people uncomfortable by starting confrontational conversations that need to be had. I will never enable a friend's or client's old patterns with my words. However, telling someone who's dog just died that they need to take responsibility, just doesn't seem cool or feel good. 

I'm dealing with something personally where I am in a lot of pain because of the actions of another person. (sorry to be vague, I just don't feel quite healed enough to share the details) For all intents and purposes, this action that hurt me was taken by someone else and totally blindsided me. I think any interaction where two parties are involved, there is always the "it takes two to tango" aspect, but I can honestly say that I feel pretty innocent. 

So... taking responsibility for the hurt, pain, anger, sadness, disappointment, etc has been really difficult for me, because I feel like the victim. On a few levels, I am the victim, but I also know a victim-mentality never helped anyone. So this distinction between blame, fault, and responsibility really helped me work through that victim mentality and come to a more productive and healing outcome. 

So here's the distinctions: 

Blame

In a situation where someone or multiple someones is/are hurt, who is to blame is a valid question. It is totally fair to blame someone/something other than yourself if you've been hurt. The example I'll use is your boyfriend cheating on you. If your boyfriend cheats on you, the pain you feel from that breach of trust is very real and would not have been there had your boyfriend not cheated on you. This pain can absolutely be blamed on him. Ok, before you feel justified in your blaming and naming, read on. 


Fault

The main thing we need to understand is that fault is not always linked to responsibility. In our society, we tend to think fault equals responsibility, and sometimes it absolutely does. If you hit someone with your car, it's probably your fault. However, if we stay with this example of the cheating boyfriend, it is not your fault your boyfriend cheated on you. You could have been having arguments, you could not have gotten along with his friends, whatever, none of that makes it your fault. He took the action and cheated. That could never be your fault. Again, keep reading though...  



Responsibility

This is something you always, always have. There are no other options. We are the only ones that live in our bodies and are the only ones living our lives, so we always have responsibility for the way we react no matter who is at fault or who is to blame. Again with the cheating example, your boyfriend can be blamed for your pain, it is his fault that your relationship is blown up, however, it is still your responsibility to decide what to do with all this. You could see it as an impetus for change in your relationship, maybe it's a gift letting you know he is an asshole before you married him, or maybe it's an opportunity to look at yourself and how you act in your relationships. 

Taking responsibility for EVERYTHING is the only option for an empowered life, but that most certainly doesn't mean you have to take on blame or fault yourself. 

Want help getting clear on how to take responsibility for your life without feeling guilty or ashamed? 

I have 10 slots open for my 30min $20 Introductory Self-Love Sessions this week and next week. Request yours by filling out this form (first come, first serve).

 

The Healing Power of Anger

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As a lot of women and men out there this week I’m sure, I’ve been thinking a lot about the #metoo phenomenon. The sheer amount of social media posts from friends, family members, online influencers, etc who have posted this message of solidarity against the objectification of women, doesn’t exactly surprise me but it has definitely required me to sit with some unpleasant emotions of sadness, outrage, hopelessness and anger. 

When our world is swept up into a movement like this there are always so many voices, wise and unwise, true and untrue, so many subtleties that go unaddressed or are spoken about to the point nonsense. I would never want to assume I understand or know more than I do about the uniqueness of every woman’s deeply personal experience of degradation or injustice. 

But, there are some things I do know for sure: I know that I have personally, on many levels, been harassed, exploited, and used by men. I know that I feel and carry with me the unspeakable wounds inflicted on my precious body and my sisters’ bodies and minds every day consciously and unconsciously. I know that when we humans hurt each other we are not just hurting the other person, we are hurting ourselves. We cannot give without receiving, and we cannot hurt without being hurt. I know that women have been raped, abused and mistreated for lifetimes and that this weighs on each and every one of our souls. 

I also know that to truly heal we must brave the sea of despair. We must look at the Truth of the abuse square in the face, and step into the darkness beyond it. That is why, I know for sure that outrage is part of the healing process. I know that for us to truly heal, as a society and as individuals, we must allow the cleansing power of our anger to wash over us, and give us the inner light to navigate the unknown territory of forgiveness. 

Anger reminds us of the Truth of our worth. To recover from being violated, personally and collectively, we must use the alchemical fire of anger to transform the hurt and pain into power. We use anger to realize and take action towards reclaiming our power, without apology. It gives us the power to sail on that sea of hopeless and trust that there is another shore, a better shore. If you feel sad, shocked, abused, mistreated, properly channeled outrage is the power that moves you through. 

As Bethany Webster said so perfectly: “Do what so few dare to do: Give your anger a safe, empathic space to be fully, completely felt.  Harness it, listen to it. Anger has so many gifts. Not indiscriminate, projected anger, but the energy of outrage, felt and placed where it truly belongs. Collective female outrage is a nectar that this world needs.” 

So be brave. Feel the anger. This is what healing feels like. 

Advice for When the Darkness Creeps In

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I've been feeling majorly down in the dumps. A bout of traveling sickness (the unglamorous side of traveling!!) and a realization that some things in my business are going to have to change, had me moping around and in a dark headspace.

So, as I've been known to do, I picked up a pen, closed my eyes, descended into the Sanctuary of my Heart and channeled my Higher Self for some advice. I'm sharing this because I thought it might reach someone else in a time of need.

This is what She ( I ) said:

Hey my Sister,

I know what it feels like when darkness creeps into your bones
I'm familiar with that heaviness
That lethargy
That weariness

When the fight seems too exhausting
Too big
Overwhelming
Too much still undone
Remember I've been there
I Still go there..

The darkness is in me too
The darkness is part of us
When we are Whole we don't get to leave parts of us behind

We say to the darkness, "come in, sit at the table."

I'm not here to sugar coat things
To tell you, "do this and you'll be happy forever!" 
I'm here to be a voice for Love. 
Real, unconditional, all-empowering: L O V E

And Love does not discriminate. 
It doesn't judge. 
You are just as worthy of Love when you are in the throughs of negativity as you are when you're positive
You are Loved when you are at worst & no less than when you are at your best.

So remember, when the darkness comes, we are in this together. You could never screw this up.

5 Ways to Love Yourself

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I believe that self-love is THE MOST IMPORTANT THING. Like in the world. Like always and forever.

Ok, strong statements, I know, but hear me out… 

Out of every single person in the world, I am the only one who knows what it feels like to be me.  I am the only person who hears how I hear, who sees how I see, who loves the way I love, who experiences sadness in my way, who understands joy the way I’m meant to. I am, was and will be, with myself. It’s the one thing I can guarantee. If I don’t love me, I’m in a very difficult situation. And all this goes for you. 

When we put our happiness, worthiness, valuation in someone or something else, we are saying something else matters more than our own sovereignty. When we say to ourselves consciously or unconsciously, “For me to be happy, I need him to love me,” or “I’ll really be myself when I lose these last 10 pounds,” we are literally saying someone or something else has control over how much we are worth, how much we deserve, and how much we have. 

It doesn’t matter how much love you get from other people. It doesn’t matter what your body looks like or how many pretty, awesome, expensive things you have. If you don’t love yourself, it’s all just a guise, a false front. The core of happiness isn’t there. 

I have the incredible privilege to talk about, practice, and explore self-love every day. It is my soul obsession. It’s my purpose. Not because I think I am doing the world a service (although, I certainly hope I am!) but because it’s what I want to do, and I love and trust myself fully so I follow the urge. Simple as that. 

I’m currently traveling around the world, exploring self-love practices and spiritual theories and slowly compiling it all into a book about self-love. I work with clients all over the world as a self-love guide, walking beside women, whispering to their hearts as I can, so that they can wake up to their own inner well-spring of love. 

Here’s the Truth that I know: If we don’t need external validation, we’re much more inclined to follow our hearts. And if we all followed that precious, holy space called our heart more often we would be kinder, more loving, and less afraid. 

Here are 5 ways to love yourself, today, right now, this week, whenever you’re ready to start. These are by no means the only ways. You get to decide the ways that work for you because you are a powerful and sovereign being with all the answers inside of you, but in case you need some help, a little information, may these 5 points be a guide. 

  1. Spend time with yourself, honestly, without distractions. This isn’t “treat yo’self” stuff like pedicures and massages (although those are definitely good forms of self-care and can be part of self-love). This could be meditation. This could just be sitting on your couch facing bravely whatever comes up when it’s quiet and you’re alone, and actually feeling it. You can’t fall in love with someone if you don’t spend time alone with them. Spend time alone with yourself. 
  2. Get really clear on what you want. Down to every last detail. You are worthy of whatever your heart desires. Spend the time to figure out what that is. You can do this as a grand whole, or you can do this for each little situation. What do you want when it comes to your love life? What do you want for dinner tonight? Get clear on all of it. You can’t get somewhere if you don’t know where you’re going, the more details, the better. 
  3. Stay in your body. Embodiment is powerful. Our bodies are precious, sacred, and holy. For us to be present we must be able to stand powerfully and confidently in our own bodies. I have so much more to say about this (it’s an entire section in my book, maybe more), but this is the basis: stay in your body. Feel it. Be it. Revere it for the awesome treasure it is. 
  4. Use your voice. This can mean different things for different people. It could be singing or chanting. It could be standing up for yourself in a situation where you’ve been walked all over or disregarded. It could be giving someone a compliment or telling them you love them. Use your voice. It’s powerful and needed.
  5. Trust your instincts. Stop second guessing yourself. Don’t ask why you want what you want. You can trust yourself. It’s OK if you mess up. It’s OK if you don’t get it right. You’ll still have you. At some point, you have to take the leap of faith and Trust that heart of yours. Break up with the guy. Quit the job. Go travel to that place. Take the course. Share your heart. Change up your diet. Stop talking to that lady who always makes you feel inadequate. Give in to the pull. Let things fall away. Start small if you need to, but practice makes perfect and to practice trusting your True self, you’ve got to start. 

I’ve created an online program, revolutionize your life: 21-weeks to self-love, that was birthed out of this beautiful obsession with self-love, my personal journey, and my walking alongside clients. This program puts all of this experience with self-love into a comprehensive and intentional process that allows you to enter the sanctuary of your own heart. A place you have within you, always. A place that never judges, never punishes, and is never not there. 

If you are feeling the resonance with this self-love activation and you know that you want to start making self-love a priority, I invite you to check out the program information and see where it takes you. 

I’m offering the readers of the piece a special code: SAVE500, which will save you $500 when entered in the coupon code space during the check out process (valid for one week).  

Only Love, 

Clara 

What to Do When You Feel Out of Control

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I’ve been having one of those weeks where I’m feeling a little lost, a little out of control. I've been traveling for so long and now that I've finally got a significant amount of time in one place everything feels like it's going slow motion. Personally, there's been a slowing down. A refocusing. It's the feeling of a season change. Turning inward. It's melancholy, in a comforting way. 

In the greater world, there are so many things happening right now that feel out of control too. The flooding in Texas and the path of hurricane Irma. The earthquake centered in Mexico, of which the aftershocks woke me up in my bed in Guatemala last night (the date I’m writing this is 9/8/2017, just in case you're reading this later). The last two weeks I was visiting family in Montana and the wild fires left my clothes and hair smelling like a campfire for days. The smoke burning my lungs and darkening the sky.

To say all this in a way that lacks description but also encompasses the entirety I'm feeling is: It's a lot. A very easy time to fall into fear and depression. And when we feel like this, lost, overwhelmed and hopeless it can be really easy and comfortable to fall into the known mindsets of worry, scarcity, distrust, and lack. 

But, I made a decision a long time ago that I wanted to live a life from the other side of those constricting thought patterns.

I live a life that leaves room for the melancholy, hopelessness, and sadness but isn’t defined by them. I made a decision to be a person who Trusts. Even when it feels like I’m floating off into space without any anchor, I Trust that it’s what I need. To feel alone. To feel sad. All feelings are gifts, little guides, brining me home. 

Even when I feel like I’m spinning out of control, I am committed to releasing my grip even further, because who says spinning is bad anyway? Self-love is allowing the feelings, no judgment because we respect ourselves enough to know have feelings for a reason, to guide us towards what we need.  

I want to live in a world where qualities like trust, acceptance, joy, space, allowance, are the default. Where challenges are seen as learning experiences that sharpen our minds, strengthen our characters, and stretch our hearts. Where we see difficult emotions as a sign that we need to do the difficult work of slowing down, turning inward, and giving ourselves space. And how to do we make changes in the world? We “be the change we would like to see,” as Ghandi says.  

So in the midst of a challenge of feeling out of control, let’s not harden our shells, or tighten our grip, but let the change come. Let’s focus on what we CAN do, not what feels impossible. Let’s focus on what is being washed away and let go. Let’s realize that for all new seeds to germinate and bloom there must a period of sowing. 

So let the change come. 

Let the falling away happen. 

Hold the change that's happening like a delicate flower in the palm of your hand, with tenderness, with respect, with love, until it's ready to be released. 

You are always more than enough. I believe you. You can let whatever difficult change is happening to you right now, happen. You can let the world hold you. Soften into it. Blur around the edges. Be swept away. 

As we meet our challenges with love, allowance, and tenderness, we meet ourselves with the same qualities, and self-love changes our lives and we change the world. 

Body Love Realization

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All the rules are off. 

No more required kale. 

No more required vitamins. 

No more guilt because I didn’t exercise. 

No more obsessive thoughts about ‘needing’ yoga each day. 

No more lists in my phone about my new commitments (that only make me feel bad the next day when I fail to follow through)

No more rules about the way my body should fit into denim, spandex, and cloth

No more worrying about the fact that my skin isn’t flawlessly smooth

No more hiding my tears when they start to flow in public (or in private)

No more shame around the size of my arms 

No more looking at my face and wishing it was more symmetrical 

No more looking at my lips and wishing they were more full

No more not wearing bright colored yoga pants because my cellulite might show  

No more denying who I am right now

I am finally ready to give into the pull 

To get lost in the depths of my soul 

How can I go deeper? 

My heart has been whispering me secrets for so long,

leading me along so lovingly; so gently. 

How could I have not heard? 

How could I have not listened? 

Us humans are funny beings 

Heads down.

Obsessively involved in the upkeep of our own suffering

But the voice telling us to look up is there; always 

Softly reminding us with the joy bubbling up inside, if we would only pay attention NOW

Where is joy trying to bubble up? 

It calls our attention, humbly, with flowers blooming, with sun shining, with grasses waving, with arms outreaching, with rain falling, with dogs wagging their tails at us, with laughter 

The under current of magic and mystery that pervades every moment. Every thing. 

This voice lets me know that there has been no mistake. 

There is nothing to be done, to be accomplished, to be gotten 

There is nothing I need to do to be more me. 

I am me. 

What a blessing. 

How to Use the Eclipse for Your Own Good

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Have you been feeling that eclipse energy? 

Maybe you’ve been feeling a little on edge? A little more emotional than normal?

A solar eclipse creates pressure. Necessary pressure, in our inner life as well as in outer society. A pressure that births new beginnings and change. This same pressure, pushes up old patterns, beliefs and sometimes, ugliness to the surface, to be healed and let go of. 

As Sonia and Sabrina Choquette say, ““A solar eclipse creates pressure to our inner and outer worlds. Scientifically, the solar eclipse creates a higher atmospheric pressure called the Atlas’s Effect. Pendulums behave differently as our air pressure is slightly elevated. Historically a solar eclipse has had a profound emotional and psychological effects on human beings. Astrologically speaking, a solar eclipse energy will trigger many of our subconscious fears as it awakens our souls' growth.” 

Yesterday (8/17/2017) I was feeling kind of off. The only way I can describe it was it felt like I was kind of humming inside my body. Nothing that would stop me from going about my daily routine, but a slight humming. Kind of how you feel after chanting, or a deep meditation or an awesome yoga class. 

I’ve had this feeling before. It’s a familiar kind of ‘off’, and pretty enjoyable really, but it is normally accompanied by something unpleasant or a period of forced introspection. I’ve come to view this humming feeling as an invitation to accept a “leveling up.” It’s the way my body lets me know, “OK. We’re going to rework some things, and it’s might have to get real.”I guess I think of it as my physical form is being invited into or to use a new frequency, a higher vibration. 

And today (8/18/2017)… I am sick. It's a shaky, achy, headache-y, kind of sickness. My whole body hurts and it is definitely making me stop my daily routine. I’m writing this in bed while lying down. It feels like being dizzy or carsick. Almost like this new frequency, I’m being invited into is giving me motion sickness. 

If this idea of “frequency” and “vibration” is new to you, I know this might sound kind of cray-cray. In the words of my husband, “Personally, I don’t connect with the idea that a solar eclipse has anything to do with someone feeling sick.” (do you see what he did there? He’s such a good communicator : ) ). 

That’s OK. I understand that sometimes these things are beyond the realm of understanding and/or belief for some people, but my point with this story is that we can use the extra pressure in our atmosphere and inner worlds for positive change if we chose to. Freedom is in the choice. This energy, pressure, event can give us a little extra push to make the choice to let go. To heal. To release. To change. 

Maybe you are super tuned into this high-pressure energetic time and you’ve got your sage bundles, crystals, journaled intentions, essential oils and meditation cushion all ready for the eclipse. Or maybe you have entirely different ways to celebrate it. Cool. It’s all good. 

Either way, right now, I invite you to get a little introspective about the last few weeks. Have you felt more intense than normal? Maybe sad, upset, angry, frustrated, sick? There have been some outrageous and ugly things happening in the world, but these horrendous acts have also been met with a huge upheaval of kindness, love, and life-affirming action. Have you been swept up in that? Do you feel the intensity? 

So what do we do with this intensity? This extra emotional charge? 

We hear the invitation to slow down. We start or restart our meditation/contemplative practice, or add a few more minutes on each day or second meditation. We hear the invitation to check in with our internal world and make sure that we’re on a path that brings us joy. We allow the feelings to come up without judgment so that they may be processed and let go. If we get sick we see the message in the sickness, “Slow down. Take care of yourself. Rest.” Maybe we go to a special yoga class. 

You may find that it’s more likely for you to have deep conversations with people during this pressed time. We can open ourselves up to totally new and previously unimaginable solutions to problems. We break down some of the self-imposed conditions and experience fuller and more complete joy. 

I invite you to use this extra energy in the cosmos and in you to “level up.” To experience greater and greater clarity. To allow the time and space that it takes to rearrange your inner world with the knowledge that when we’re open to healing our inner world, we heal our outer world as well. Send your roots down deep, so that you can rise up strong. It may be a bumpy ride. But, this is what healing looks like. 

 

 

 

 

 

An Open Letter To Anyone Who Feels "Not Enough"

I got a message from a tribe member of mine recently talking about how she was just so tired of hating her body, of that feeling of guilt every time she ate. She was so tired of constantly thinking she should be working out more, or less, or differently. She was tired of not feeling comfortable in her own skin. In it, she said how she knew, deep down, that she shouldn't feel this way, that there had to be a better way, but it seemed just out of reach. It came up over and over again just how exhausted she was with it all. How incredibly draining it all is. The constant worrying. The constant needing to be different. The constant anxiety around who she is. 

Women who are struggling with this exact issue are who I am talking to every time I write a post for social media. They are who I am thinking of every time I write a blog post. The constant aching that results from worrying so fucking much about what other people think about us is what I hope my words can be a soothing balm for. 

So… in the interest of extending hope, I thought I’d write a letter to anyone who feels this way. To anyone is feeling beyond exhausted by the incessant pull to be different than they are, the never-ending compulsion to do more, know more, be more: this letter is for you. 

I hope it lets you breathe a little bit deeper. 
I hope it reignites something that has been buried in the embers of your soul. 
I hope it brings you comfort. 
I hope it acts as a tonic for the part of you that’s been sick. 

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Dear powerful, amazing, incredible woman, 

I know you’re more than tired. 
I know you’re hurting. 
I know it seems like this grind of needing more things, smaller or more muscular thighs, a more toned stomach or arms, a straighter nose, bigger lips, more “will power”, and on and on, will never end. 

I have been there. 
I know exactly what that feels like. 
My bones are still vibrating with the reverberations of that frequency of compulsiveness. 
My eyes recognize your struggle. 
My ears hear to your pain. 
My heart hurts with yours. 

But… 

I’ve also seen the Light. 
I’ve seen the Truth. 

And the Truth is that you are worthy beyond your WILDEST DREAMS. 
The Truth is that you are Pure Love. 
The Truth is that this form, this body you so intensely think makes you unworthy is simply and beautifully the thought of Love in form. 
It’s the content of these heartbreakingly lovely forms (our bodies) that matter. 
This body, this form, that brings us so much strife, is an incredible and incomprehensibly intelligent communication device. 

I have been in the depths of perceived unworthiness
I have been in the space that feels like the self-loathing could never turn into self-love
And I am grateful for it
Because finally, it broke me open
I finally cracked and when I did, the pathway to the Light was opened. 

You won’t always look at your body and think, “You are so fucking sexy!” 
That’s not the point. 
But, you can get to a place where you look at your body and feel nothing but awe and gratitude. 
The self-negating Voice in your head won’t totally disappear or be replaced by only nice words. 
That’s also not the point. 
But, you can get to a place where that voice has no power. 
As one of my clients said, “The Voice is like a drunk bum on the street, yelling obscenities at you. You would never take what he says seriously. You know he’s mentally ill and belligerently drunk.” 


In other words, you can get to place where Love is what dwells in authority in your life, not Fear. 
You can get to a place where you have such a solid base of self-respect and self-compassion that nothing could ever topple you. 
Nothing could ever take away your own authority, your sovereignty, your self-respect. 
Not men. 
Not mean comments. 
Not food. 
Not exercise or lack of exercise. 
Not money. 
Not online comments. 
Not even a whole society that’s revolved around making you think you need to be smaller or need more or different things to be loved. 
When you re-member the love that lives inside of you, you are uncrushable, unshakable, unbreakable. 

The not-so-secret-secret is that this power to return to Love is already inside of you. 
You only have to re-member it. 

Don't ever forget that I am right there with you. 

Only Love, 

Clara


If this resonates with you and you are ready to re-member that Love inside of you, come join me in a journey back to yourself, a journey back home: an awakening of Love's authority. Revolutionize Your Life: twenty-one weeks to Self Love, is an online course I have birthed after taking the lessons learned from my deeply personal journey of healing and recreating and systematizing that process for hundreds of one on one clients. This online program is literally a twenty-one week journey back to yourself, to awaken that inner self-respect that is unshakeable.

5 Ways to Change Your Bad Attitude Right Now

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As you know if you’ve been following me I'm traveling around the world to write a book and experience true life by design. It’s been amazing. It’s brought on so much gratitude and heart opening and love. But, it’s also been a huge ongoing lesson in stepping out of my comfort zone. Right now, I live outside my comfort zone. 

This past week we’ve arrived in Guatemala, which will be our home base until January 2018. Since my husband already speaks Spanish and I would love to learn it, and since this will be our home for a significant amount of time I decided to sign myself up for Spanish school… 4 hours a day, for three weeks. On top of that, we also decided to live with a Guatemalan family for three weeks so we can be truly submerged in all things Espanol. 

Now, let’s talk about comfort zones. 

As someone who has been obsessed with personal development for the majority of her life, I am pretty comfortable being uncomfortable. You can't develop personally unless you’re willing surrender your ideas about what is and what isn't, and put faith in things outside your current perceptions. Give me lots of meditation practices to do, I’m on it. Tell me to change my limiting beliefs, I know exactly where to start. Put me in a cramped bus in Africa with only standing room, no problem. Put a chicken on my lap and five screaming kids around me, I'll laugh. If, to get to the next level, I need leap into the unknown, I can do it, it won’t always be easy but I can do it. I dig adversity and I know to grow you have to face it. 

However, there is one thing that still makes me super uncomfortable and brings up oodles of resistance and excuses, and that is a situation where I can’t say what I want to the people around me. Sure, it’s OK if I'm checking into a hotel and the desk clerk doesn’t speak English, in this case it's pretty obvious what needs to happen, give me a key and a room number. I don't mind too much trying to explain to a taxi driver in a foreign country where I need to get to. Pull out a map and point usually works fine. But to not be able to communicate with the people I see day after day because I don't know how to ask questions or tell them they look nice, or that I enjoy the food they cooked for me, gets me all sorts of bothered and frustrated. 

So… as you can imagine attending these Spanish classes and living with a family that speaks only Spanish has been something that has the potential to get me really, really uncomfortable. And when I get uncomfortable to this extent, I tend to make excuses as to why it’s 'too hard.' I watch myself starting to develop a shitty attitude toward the whole experience because it becomes everything else’s fault that I don’t feel good. 

I think we’ve all experienced this phenomenon, right? 

It goes like this: We’re upset because things aren’t going the way we would like them to, so we project that out onto the situation and blame the people, the place, or just the whole situation itself for the way we feel. 

But the truth is, we are responsible for the way we feel in any situation. We get to decide how to react to ANY situation that comes our way. We are not victims of this world. We are creative and powerful beings of star dust that get to decide if we will place our loyalty in LOVE or FEAR, during each and every moment. 

So when we are truly struggling to keep our creative power in mind, when the situation is so far outside our comfort zone that our normal methods of bringing ourselves back to the truth don’t work, I’ve come up with 5 things we can do, right this moment, to shift our attitude from one of negativity to one of positivity.  

1. Change your perspective.

I mean literally change the way you are observing the world. Lay on the ground, get a horizontal perspective. Do a handstand against the wall, see the situation upside down. Do a summersault, see the world turning. Spin around in circles until you fall over, see the world spinning. Just do it. It works! 

2. Take a power pose.

In the same way that our thoughts can change our physical body, the position of our physical body can change our thoughts. So if you’re feeling all closed off and salty, stand in a pose that opens you up and makes you feel connected for 5 mins. One of my favorites is seated on the ground with arms and face open toward the sky, receiving. You could also stand with feet wider than hip distance apart, hands on hips and a big fat smile on your face. 

3. Go outside.

If you’re feeling like everything is too hard and everything is just not fair, just go take a walk around the block. Get outside. Even better yet, take your shoes off and let your feet touch the earth. Everything seems a lot less hopeless and frustrating with the sun on your face, earth under your feet, and the wind in your hair. 

4. Just Breathe.

Take 10 deep breaths. Like really, really deep breaths. In through the nose, filling up the lungs from the bottom to the top, and out through the mouth. This may sound like an overused one, but that’s only because it actually works. When we breathe deeply and our diaphragm presses into our intestines this signals to our brain that nothing is wrong and that it is safe to go into the parasympathetic nervous system response (rest and digest). Which means we can think more clearly and more lovingly. 

5. Recite or write down three things you are grateful for

Gratitude is the gateway drug to joy. It's a prerequisite of a happy life. When we bring attention to what we are grateful for it immediately changes our outlook. 

BONUS!

If none of the above work for you and you’re still feeling like your attitude is sucky just stop doing what you’re doing and come back to it later. If you’re all crabby your style is most definitely cramped and you’re not doing your best work, being nice, or bringing good vibes to whatever it is you're working on experience. It’s perfectly acceptable to go take a breather. Change what you’re doing. Watch some Game of Thrones. Eat some dark chocolate. The key is ENJOY what you take a break doing. Don’t take a break and then feel guilty for taking a break. Come back to your frustrating work after you’re feeling less up the wall. 

Leave a comment and let me know if you tried any of these are what you experienced.. 

You are Free

You are Free

True freedom means we aren't encumbered by "norms" or someone else's ideas about what makes sense. It means we get to decide who, what & how we are. 

Freedom = holding space for dichotomy. Liberation = Being YOU.

You are your own FREE woman. 

Taste it. 

Smell it. 

See it. 

Feel it. 

You are liberated. 

We are the Fire

photo cred: source unknown (let me know if you know and I'll cite) 

photo cred: source unknown (let me know if you know and I'll cite) 

As of the writing of this blog post, I am currently in the midst of a divine feminine pilgrimage around the south of France. I am visiting three relatively well-known sites that all have ties to pre-Christianity and post Christianity feminine significance.  

1. Sainte Baume: The Grotto (cave) of Mary Magdelene. According to legend Mary Magdelene came to what is now Southern France on a ship with no sails and ended up living in this cave for 30 years, until her death. This cave supposedly holds her "relics" aka bones. Close to this site is the Cave of Eggs. An ancient place associated with the Goddess and a place where pre-Christian pagans came to ask for assistance on matters of fertility.

the grotto of Mary Magdelene in St. Baume, France

the grotto of Mary Magdelene in St. Baume, France

2. Saintes-Maries-de-la-mer. Saint Sarah, the Black Madonna. There is a "black Madonna" statue in the crypts of the church in the small town of Saintes-Maries-de-la-mer, France that was discovered in the 1500s. There are a few black Madonna statues scattered throughout Europe. They are on the whole very old and very rare. Mostly shrouded in mystery as far as origins and explanations. For instance,  "Why are they black?" is a common question, but no clear answer. This particular one is the patron saint of the Romani people and is kept on display for visitors.  

Saint Sarah in Saintes-Maries-de-la-mer 

Saint Sarah in Saintes-Maries-de-la-mer 

3. Le Puy en velay. Another ancient black madonna statue, this one called, "The Black Virgin," is housed in the cathedral in Le Puy. The first record of the Black Virgin is 1294, and we know that She was very old even then. Again, mystery pervades. 

The Black Virgin at Le Puy en velay, France 

The Black Virgin at Le Puy en velay, France 

 

So the question that you may be asking yourself in one way or another is, "Why the pilgrimage, Clara?" 

Well... 

I am on this pilgrimage because as I travel this path towards more and more and greater and greater self acceptance and self love, I'm becoming more and more aware of how my power has been hidden, shamed, and disguised as something else. 

I am every day waking up to the fact that there has been an attempt to downgrade and shrink what it means to be a woman. The constant messages (media, gender roles, politics, etc) we are conditioned with do this.

For example:

  • To be a woman worthy of love or sexual attention, we need to be a certain size, shape or weight.
  • To be a "good" woman we should be calm and collected and self sacrificing
  • We should be sexy but not too sexy. 
  •  We should be be skinny, but, wait.. oh now we should be "strong" (aka musclely and lean)

And on and on. Until we're a culture full of women trying to "get their body back" and "lean out" and "fit into my skinny jeans." 

The sheer amount of time, thought energy and real energy spent by women (and men I am sure, it is spilling over) worrying about how they look, comparing themselves to others, and biting their nails over what they are eating and how they are exercising, is mind boggling. 

And I'll let you in on a little secret I've only just discovered... there's no point to any of those self-negating thoughts, the idea that we need to "punish" ourselves with food restriction or exercise, or the idea that you need to "control" yourself in any way. You don't have to do any of it. It's not helping. 

You need only love yourself and the magic starts to happen. When you commit to loving yourself no matter what, you start to want to move your body in a way that energizes you. You want to eat food that makes your body feel good. You want to set healthy boundaries and make life choices that respect your beautiful body. 

When you start to turn it all around. When you start to spend time loving yourself and thinking good thoughts about your body and all it does for you, something huge starts to happen.

You take back your autonomy and sovereignty as a woman.

You start to see that no one gets to determine your worthiness, but you. You start to see that you were never broken and you'll never be broken. You start to connect with the love that is a well spring of your heart, which comes from the inside, not the outside. And you start to wonder, as I have, what in the hell is going on that so many women feel so enslaved by external beauty standards and external worthiness ideals. 

The never ending external environmental cues we get about how we should look, act, feel, and be are powerful, no doubt, and it takes practice, commitment, and sisterhood to see through them, but self love starts to cut through the bullshit and we begin to see. 

So, that's why I'm on this pilgrimage.. to discover what has been buried in me and outside of me. To remind myself of a time and place where women were revered, and bring that time and place to the now. To familiarize myself with a divinity that includes feminine bodies and their numinous functions. To unearth the Truth that is rising in me and rising in the world. (If you're reading this, I know you can feel it too.)

The Truth is that women are sacred. That we are autonomous. That we are powerful creators and our worthiness is not given, but claimed. It's been here all along, we've just been asleep. 

This divine feminine pilgrimage is part of a waking up process that started for me when I first decided to eat in a way that served me, by listening to my body, and has snow balled into a revolutionary realization that I can say, feel, act, and BE whatever the hell I want to, because I AM. 

I Am the Fire

I am the flame that burns brighter as the night gets darker

The breath in my lungs is the wind that ignites me 

It blows out the old & takes in the new 

I am the water of my blood, flowing and adaptable, 

Waiting to transform whatever I get, into what I need

The Earth of my body being my chosen anchor

The roots running deep so that I may Rise up 

Nothing could knock me down 

I am the destroyer

I tear down delusion 

I Burn up all that doesn't serve

Only so that some new, more loving seed can be planted 

And grow, stronger & more assured 

I am the nurturer 

Straight out of creation 

Shaping form so that light may be experienced 

So that Love may be poured somewhere it has not been known before

You could not hold me down 

You could not stifle me 

You could not control me 

For I am you

I am in the wildness in Her eyes 

I am in the howl at the Moon 

I am Human & Goddess

Future & Past & Present 

You could not throw me into the Fire

for I am the Flame 

How to Love Yourself When You Don't Deserve It

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This is something that I don't really want to share, but I am sharing it anyway because I think it's of utmost importance for me to be real. For me to be honest, even about things that make me look like I don't have it together (secret: I don't! Never have.)

I've also been thinking along the lines the Rumi quote, "Forget safety. Live where you fear to live. Destroy your reputation. Be notorious." And Danielle LaPorte's quote, "Risk being very, very misunderstood." 

I don't want for people to see my dark side. I don't want people to think I've done wrong. It's not safe. It's not reputable.

But... 

I think it's important that people see the way that life brings me to my knees (because we're probably on our knees together) as well as to see how (when we choose to see it that way) Life hands us opportunities over and over again to bring love where there was no love before, sometimes in the most painful ways. 

I'm hoping some will relate to this and find some comfort, and that's why it's worth being vulnerable, open and honest. 

As I wrote this it also felt so incredibly healing for me. Like a weight being lifted. So I also write and share this for me. Because I don't want to cover up. I don't want to lie. I want my inner world to line up with my outer world even if that means destroying my reputation a little bit. 

"For a seed to achieve its greatest expression, it must come undone. The shell cracks, its insides come out and everything changes. To someone who doesn't understand growth, it could look like complete destruction." - Cynthia Occelli 

I messed up pretty bad recently. 

It hurt people. People I know and people I don't know. 

It made me look like a phony. It made me look like I don't stand strong in what I preach. 

It feels awful. 

There are parts of me that want to crawl into a hole. 

This isn't the first time something like this has happened in my life. I've lied. I've cheated. I've hurt people. 

Sometimes we do things that our higher selves would never, ever do.

Now, the question is always: why?

Why do we do things we know are wrong?

Why would we semi-knowingly do something we know has the potential to hurt a person/people?

In the case of my recent experience, I did it because I didn't take the time to stop and feel. Looking back on it, it was really an act of desperation. I got caught up in the deluded story of egoic ambition, 'lack' of time and just straight up carelessness. It felt wrong the whole time but I couldn't be bothered to notice that feeling. I had stuff that needed to get done! So I got it done. 

When we ignore our gut instincts, don't pay attention to the subtle clues, and fall into unconscious patterns we're bound to do things that don't align with our soul. 

I want to be clear about something: I am not a bad person. I am very, very committed to my work and my journey. I may have done many things in my life I am not proud of, but my heart is pure and it longs for belonging and love. I may be confused about how to get those things at times, and my ego may do things that seem obviously wrong to the rational observer, but I know it is all done with the intention of getting love and belonging. 

I believe the same is true for everyone on this planet.

As the Way of Mastery says: "Self-honesty is the greatest act of love." And I am only being honest with myself. 

I preach compassion and forgiveness but what happens when I'm the one who so desperately needs compassion and forgiveness? What about when I want so badly for the person I hurt to see my true heart and how sorry I am, but I hurt them so they're not interested? Guilt. Guilt happens. Overwhelming-gut-wrenching-heart-breaking guilt. 

Now, guilt can be constructive. It can give us a feeling in the moment that lets us know to never do that thing we just did again. When we've done wrong, we need to be aware of it. 

But, as Danielle LaPorte says, "If you can muster some tenderness for yourself when you think you’re at your worst—at precisely the time when you think you deserve criticism or punishment––then you’re on the way to stable self-esteem."

If you did something wrong, own it. Apologize. Do what you can to make amends. In this particular situation, I took complete responsibility. I stayed up until the wee hours of the morning doing what I could to fix it. I expressed deep regret. I felt that guilt in the moment. And, I can honestly say it's changed me. I feel grateful for and humbled by the experience.  

Feeling the constructive guilt in the moment teaches our psyche not to do that again. But, we can't follow the story of the guilt ('I'm a bad person', 'I don't deserve love', etc) just FEEL the guilt. Is it a tightness in my chest? A gut punch? Notice the feeling. Make note of it, allow it. 

If we lie, cheat, steal, break promises, commitments, act like an asshole, it's so easy for us to fall into the self-loathing hole or we could get super defensive because we want to make excuses to make it hurt less or we could try to numb ourselves to the pain of it all with various distractions: eating, drinking, obsessing about the situation and how it could have gone differently. But this does nothing for us and nothing for the person/people we may have hurt or affected with our bad behavior. It just breaks us down. 

I'm so tempted to berate myself, feel sorry for myself, be totally depressed in a marinade of shame, and, honestly, I've given in to this a bit. 

But.... I can feel the part of me knows that this lesson will serve me. This part of me prays my suffering will be of service to the world in some way. And this part is getting stronger and stronger with each screw-up. And that's where the gratitude for a painful situation comes from. From knowing that each time I mess up, I get to bring love to a place where there has not been love before, and therefore increase the love in my life. 

"Immediate compassion for your missteps gives you the strength to take the next best step." - Danielle LaPorte

This part of me knew that I shouldn't have lied about the thing I lied about, but it also, in the background, knew that although this lesson would be painful, it would clear space for something better to take root. As Glennon Doyle Melton says, "First the pain, then the rising." This thing had to play out so that I can be where I am now, writing this piece and pouring love into a part of me that wasn't loved before. 

This experience solidifies my commitment to only doing what feels right, even if what feels right doesn't make sense in the "real" world. This experience makes so clear the ridiculousness of egoic ambition and acting out of a need for external praise. 

Sometimes the gunk, the darkness, the kept-underneath-the-rug must come to the surface to be healed. And that can look awful, messy, and a whole lot like your fault. But, it must come into the Light for it be let go. 

Whatever I did or have done, it is forgivable, but I am the only one who has to do the forgiving, other peoples' forgiveness is their own journey, which can be the hardest part of all. 

So into the Light with it all. To get through this, I'll give myself heaping doses of tenderness when I can, and when I can't, I'll pray that my suffering is of service. (Danielle LaPorte again!) 

To anyone out there struggling to forgive themselves for something they did, I'm with you. But I want you to know, no matter what it is: You have a pure heart. You can get through this and learn the lesson and become stronger for it. You are loved. You are loving. You are lovable, forever. 

Sacred Rituals

What is a sacred ritual?

These two words might conjure up images of naked women dancing around a bomb fire, or pagan sacrifices, or maybe even a taking communion at a church. Or, like me, you could have flashbacks of Buffy the Vampire Slayer reading out of some ancient book and casting spells. It could also illicit an eye-roll or two. I'm OK with that. I get it. 

If you would, please, suspend these preconceived notions about what a sacred ritual looks like or is for the duration of the time it takes to read this.

What if sacred rituals were just little actions we partook in that reminded us that there are circumstances in this world that are mysterious and out-of-of-our-control-in-a-good-way? 

We typically want everything in our life to have some semblance of control. We like comfort, consistency, and safety. This makes sense! We should want to have shelter, food, and the guarantee that our life isn't in danger. 

However, when we cling to this idea of needing-to-know too desperately, we are completely thrown off when things (inevitably) show us that we don't always have control. 

Typically, when we do realize we're not in control our mind immediately goes to the worst possible scenario.  As Gabby Bernstein explains in her book "The Universe Has Your Back" we live our lives like we're the girl in the horror movie just about to have something awful jump out in front of her. We're throwing popcorn at the screen and saying "DON'T DO IT!! YOU'RE GONNA GET HURT!!!".

The funny thing is, unlike the predictable horror movie, there normally isn't a bad guy around the corner. We're typically totally OK, and even when we're not, we typically figure it out. But we put a lot of unnecessary stress on ourselves by constantly being in the scene. 

What if the unknown or the mysterious didn't send us into a horror movie but gave us a sense of awe and wonder? 

What if instead of using our imaginations to create awful scenarios, we create beautiful ones?

Is it really that much crazier to think that taking the time to give a little offering of prayer and love to the universe could positively affect the outcome of a difficult situation, than (one of my recurring horror scenes) to feel like you're DEFINITELY going to die while you're driving in a snowstorm? We always seem to believe in the bad projections of the future and scoff at the possibility that there could be wondrous outcomes. 

Here in Bali, each day people put these little offerings (called on their doorsteps and around their home and light incense. They take the time and put the effort into creating these beautiful little offerings. These offerings are a repeated act of faith by Balinese Hindus and can be infused with intentions, prayers, or just simply put out to ask for good fortune. 

Balianese offering

Can you imagine if every person spent the time and effort of putting together a beautiful little offering and lit some incense every morning?

And so I've been thinking about this question. About the role of sacred rituals and how I might be able to create them in my life in the modern world. My feeling is that if we made time for something that felt like a sacred ritual in our lives we would feel more connected to the magic in our souls and ultimately more joyful. We would direct more of our abundant imaginative energy towards the positive instead of reliving our horror movie scene over and over. 

These sacred rituals are less about what we do, but more about how we do it. Whatever you do, do it with reverence and appreciation of something larger than just our daily routine, you can literally infuse anything with sacredness if you see it from a larger point of view. 

We are multi-dimensional beings and acknowledging our sacredness could connect us more to the aspects of ourselves that get pushed aside in our daily grind, and turn us on to the positive possibilities that come from releasing control with love instead of fear. 

So light some incense tonight. Say some prayers. Have a hot bath and honor your sacred body.

Do something that feels like it has magic in it and let me know how you feel after.... ✨💫

If you're interested in partaking in a sacred ritual but have no idea where to start I have recorded one of mine. Watch it here. Use this ritual for planting new 'seeds' in your life. A perfect time to practice this is on the night of the new moon, but it can be practiced at any time you feel you need to get back to neutral and imagine new and postive outcomes.