We believe that we'll take care of ourselves once we hit that goal.
We believe that we'll feel relaxed around food if only we could get to our "goal weight."
We believe that if we had more money or time we would most certainly get massages and buy that yoga studio membership.
We believe that we would definitely meditate, journal, and breathe deeper if only we had a couple more hours in the day.
But the truth is... these things will never be a priority unless they're a priority NOW.
And a lot of times the reason we have these "if only this, THEN I would be better.." thoughts is because we believe that somehow we're not worthy of the things we want NOW.
We believe that if we EARN our right to relax, then we will finally relax.
We believe that if we do something to DESERVE the self care, then we'll take care of ourselves.
We keep ourselves on the hamster wheel of doing.
Always working towards the next thing.
Because... what would we be if just.... stopped.
We would be OURSELVES, just as we are.. and unfortunately, most of us have decided through past experiences and programming that we are not good enough as we are.
Somewhere in the shadowy depths of our psyche there is this voice that says, "You're not worthy or eating in a relaxed way, until you're 20 lbs lighter,"
"You don't deserve to spend money on a massage since you don't make as much money as your husband."
"How could I possibly take a day to myself when I am mother of young children that need me!?"
"I can't take time to meditate and connect to myself, then I might actually 'see' what's going on in my mind!"
So the problem is; when we make our self care or worthiness contingent upon other actions or external sources, we will never get THERE.
That's not the way this way of thinking works.
We've gotta get to the root of it all: the perceived unworthiness.
We've gotta believe we are worthy of all we want before we give ourselves all we want.
We've gotta believe we're worthy of a massage, a day of blissful free time to ourselves, or a new sweater, for no reason other than we want it.
We've gotta believe that even if we watch hours of TV we're still worthy of feeling good.
We've gotta believe that even if we just ate a whole pizza we're worthy of being loved.
We'll never do enough to earn the right to relax. We may try, but we'll just play over and over in our head all the things we should have done or still need to do.
We've gotta just relax when we need it.
We'll never "catch up" up enough to slow down, if we're constantly playing into the story that we're behind.
We've gotta just stop when we need to.
We'll never make enough money to deserve to spend it freely on ourselves if we believe we aren't worth what we want right now.
We've gotta invest in ourselves and our future and trust ourselves enough to believe we'll make the correct choices.
Because, Worthiness is not given or earned; it is CLAIMED.
If you're ready to address the seed of your perceived unworthiness book a 30 min self love clarity call with me here.