change

What to Do When You Feel Out of Control

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I’ve been having one of those weeks where I’m feeling a little lost, a little out of control. I've been traveling for so long and now that I've finally got a significant amount of time in one place everything feels like it's going slow motion. Personally, there's been a slowing down. A refocusing. It's the feeling of a season change. Turning inward. It's melancholy, in a comforting way. 

In the greater world, there are so many things happening right now that feel out of control too. The flooding in Texas and the path of hurricane Irma. The earthquake centered in Mexico, of which the aftershocks woke me up in my bed in Guatemala last night (the date I’m writing this is 9/8/2017, just in case you're reading this later). The last two weeks I was visiting family in Montana and the wild fires left my clothes and hair smelling like a campfire for days. The smoke burning my lungs and darkening the sky.

To say all this in a way that lacks description but also encompasses the entirety I'm feeling is: It's a lot. A very easy time to fall into fear and depression. And when we feel like this, lost, overwhelmed and hopeless it can be really easy and comfortable to fall into the known mindsets of worry, scarcity, distrust, and lack. 

But, I made a decision a long time ago that I wanted to live a life from the other side of those constricting thought patterns.

I live a life that leaves room for the melancholy, hopelessness, and sadness but isn’t defined by them. I made a decision to be a person who Trusts. Even when it feels like I’m floating off into space without any anchor, I Trust that it’s what I need. To feel alone. To feel sad. All feelings are gifts, little guides, brining me home. 

Even when I feel like I’m spinning out of control, I am committed to releasing my grip even further, because who says spinning is bad anyway? Self-love is allowing the feelings, no judgment because we respect ourselves enough to know have feelings for a reason, to guide us towards what we need.  

I want to live in a world where qualities like trust, acceptance, joy, space, allowance, are the default. Where challenges are seen as learning experiences that sharpen our minds, strengthen our characters, and stretch our hearts. Where we see difficult emotions as a sign that we need to do the difficult work of slowing down, turning inward, and giving ourselves space. And how to do we make changes in the world? We “be the change we would like to see,” as Ghandi says.  

So in the midst of a challenge of feeling out of control, let’s not harden our shells, or tighten our grip, but let the change come. Let’s focus on what we CAN do, not what feels impossible. Let’s focus on what is being washed away and let go. Let’s realize that for all new seeds to germinate and bloom there must a period of sowing. 

So let the change come. 

Let the falling away happen. 

Hold the change that's happening like a delicate flower in the palm of your hand, with tenderness, with respect, with love, until it's ready to be released. 

You are always more than enough. I believe you. You can let whatever difficult change is happening to you right now, happen. You can let the world hold you. Soften into it. Blur around the edges. Be swept away. 

As we meet our challenges with love, allowance, and tenderness, we meet ourselves with the same qualities, and self-love changes our lives and we change the world. 

A Simple Practice to Let Go of Self-Limiting Beliefs

We all have self-limiting beliefs. They're the beliefs we hold that keep us from trying new things, keep us from fully trusting in our selves, and creating the life that we desire. They're the beliefs that tell us we're not 'good' enough, not smart enough, or not 'attractive' enough. These are beliefs that may have served us in the past and are a part of how we developed as a person. There's nothing wrong with them. However, when we know we're destined for bigger and better things sometimes we have to face these beliefs so we can leave them behind.

Here is a simple practice I've used many, many times on my own self-limiting beliefs and have embraced as a part of my daily practice. 

Step 1: Write down all limiting beliefs fears you have about life/dietary changes/the future/your health/your relationship, anything. This may be A LOT, that’s OK.

Step 2: Do the following

o   Sit with your eyes closed in a comfortable position. Take a few deep breaths in and out and reassure yourself you are safe.

o   Imagine a bright beam of light at the base of your spine traveling through the top of your head into the Universe.

o   Say out loud, “I can now release limiting beliefs instantly. I am now one with my higher self.”

o   Next, see a bright pink beaming light coming from your heart center

o   Think about your limiting belief (just one).

o   Say out loud: “Even though I have this (limiting belief) I completely and deeply love and accept myself on all known and unknown levels.”

o   Imagine the pink light from your heart healing and dissolving all parts of your body and mind where this limiting belief is being held and let forgiveness and acceptance heal and transform that belief.

o   Say out loud, “I now allow myself to receive a higher perspective to replace the belief I just released.”

o   Journal about what comes up.

o   Repeat this process for one limiting belief each day. If there is a super strong rooted limiting belief maybe repeat this process with it for a few days or do this exercise more than once in the day.

o   Consistency is key. It’s not a one-time solution, it’s something you should do consistently as a practice. 

Move toward your true purpose, without fear or indecision.. You deserve to feel full, joyful, and at ease. 

Deprivation vs Opportunity: A Mindset Shift

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When we think about changing our diet we normally think about deprivation, or all the things that we CAN’T have. However, with a simple perspective shift from deprivation thinking to thinking about the opportunity we will have to try new things, to cook in new ways, and to ignite our interest in food and flavor again we can shift how we think about the experience of changing our diet.

You are not depriving yourself. You are giving yourself the opportunity to cut out old habits and unhealthy foods so that you can flourish. You are opening a door to a new world where your body works with you and you work with your body. Taking advantage of opportunity always takes a little bit of struggle and that is where the difficulty comes in, not from deprivation, but from growth. 

How can you begin to shift your perspective around making healthier choices to one of opportunity instead of deprivation?