surrender

What Surrender Actually Looks Like...

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THE REAL MEANING OF SURRENDER
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Have you ever felt like you wanted to “give up”?
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Have you ever had a goal? A goal that you really, really, really wanted but the time was closing in + it looked like you wouldn’t reach that goal?
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Have you ever felt like you failed?
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I have. I have “failed” so many times, I could never go through them all in this little Instagram caption.
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I have failed in ways that would make you put your hand to your heart + cock your head + say “awwwww.. 😭😭.” I have failed in ways that would make your heart ache.
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But this is where surrender comes in.
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When we have an idea about what you really, really want + we think we understand how to get there + then it becomes apparent that the way we thought we would get there will not work; we can call that failure.
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Or.
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We can surrender.
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Surrender to the bigger plan.
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Surrender to the guidance being offered to us every moment.
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Surrender the attachment to “our way”.. + trust that there is another more beautiful way, if only we let go.
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“Letting go” + “surrendering” doesn’t mean to “give up”, in fact, I’ve done some of my hardest, most difficult work only after I’ve surrendered my ideas about the way things “SHOULD LOOK” or “SHOULD BE.”
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When you truly surrender your path + your single perception of the what you think would be the greatest outcome then you O P E N yourself up to MORE possibilities. The things you could do in the moment expand. You are giving yourself more options.
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Surrendering doesn’t mean stopping + doing nothing + acquiescing to what’s happening.. it means asking “I believe in miracles.. so if there was ONE MORE THING I could do.. what would that be?”
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And then letting go of the idea that you know the best way.
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Surrender today, my loves, AND keep going for what you want.
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I’m with you. 💗




Surrender and Ease: the Key to True Success

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Success and fulfillment are different, but they both require surrender. 

When we think of success we normally think of material things; a nice car, a big house, money, vacations, etc. But, when we think about fulfillment we normally think of something deeper. A job well done. A purpose met. A connection. Fulfillment is spiritual, where as success is more material. 

When we talk about either success or fulfillment we tend to refer to our profession or career. A career can definitely create success, but it also can bring a lot of fulfillment or un-fulfillment.

A lot of times when we talk about the success of our business ventures or careers, our health and wellness, or the fulfillment of our life's purpose we talk about all the “hard work” involved; all the struggle and pain we've had to endure or the time we had to “put in” to be where we are now. 

But right here; right now, I’m going to totally and completely disagree with this notion of necessary struggle; because in my life; I’ve always had the biggest breakthroughs, the most success and fulfillment when I let go; when I surrender. When I let things align. When I stop “trying” so damn hard all the time.

On some level we all tend to believe we don’t deserve good things to happen to us; that we need to or should be required to work super hard for all we desire.

But the truth is; the moment we focus on aligning with what feels good and let the rest go; is when true fulfillment happens.

THAT is when life gets good. 

You are good enough to have all you want.

You are deserving of all your desires.

You have permission to want what you want.

But don’t let the fact that you might not have it all right now make you play the victim.

The truth is you already have it all anyway. The truth is your true success and all the fulfillment you're looking for is already in your own heart. You've just got to re-member it. 

So I’m going to go totally against the grain and say that you will find true success and fulfillment when you let things be EASY.

When you find pleasure and joy in the work; not by banging your head against a wall and hustling until you squeeze the life out of your adrenals.

Life is meant to be fun, wild, and enjoyable.

Your work is your purpose; and that comes easily.

Stop the resistance. Make the choice. Stretch your heart open to fit whatever is happening inside of it.

Your only job is to breathe into whatever is happening right now; and appreciate it.

I’m with you.

What I Know for Sure

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1. I am Supported

I know that we live in a benevolent universe. I know that every single thing that happens to you, to me, to everyone is part of something that is supporting us through a journey of learning to love more deeply, more comprehensively, and more totally. 

I know shitty things happen. I know painful things happen. I know experiences and people can be unfair, overwhelming, and seemingly hopeless. But I also know that when we feel the burn of hurt, it’s the exact opportunity to give in, to crack open, to say, “I don’t know the answers,” and let ourselves be guided by this Universal support. It’s simple, but not always easy. 

2. Self-Love is the Always the Answer

Out of every single person in the world, I am the only one who knows what it feels like to be me.  I am the only person who hears how I hear, who sees how I see, who loves the way I love, who experiences sadness in my way, who understands joy the way I’m meant to. I am, was and will be, with myself. It’s the one thing I can always guarantee. If I don’t love me, I’m in a very difficult situation. 

When we put our happiness, worthiness, or valuation in someone or something else, we are saying something else matters more than our own sovereignty. When we say to ourselves consciously or unconsciously, “For me to be happy, I need him to love me,” or “I’ll really be myself when I lose these last 10 pounds,” we are literally saying someone or something else has control over how much we are worth, how much we deserve, and how much we have. 

It doesn’t matter how much love you get from other people. It doesn’t matter what your body looks like or how many pretty, awesome, expensive things you have. If you don’t love yourself, it’s all just a guise, a false front. Self-love, loving ourselves honestly and fully, is the key to having a fulfilling life. It’s the key to everything I care about and want to care about. 

3. I am Responsible for EVERYTHING that Happens to Me

(See last week’s blog post about the differences between responsibility, fault, and blame for more clarification.)

This is the most empowering statement I can think of. Living in this space is the space where miracles happen. It is where we take control of our lives, our fates, and our happiness. 

People always rally against this idea though.They want to say, “but what about when my husband cheated on me?” or “what about when my dad died in a car wreck?” Yes, these awful things happen, and they hurt and they are not your fault. But you do get to decide what you do with it. You do get to decide how you react. You do get to decide how you see what’s left after the bomb drops. 

4. Where There is Fear There is Power (or Real Vulnerability Makes Us Invulnerable)

This will be it’s own blog post someday I’m sure. But I know that true power lies in being exactly who you are. Being exactly who you are means no hiding, no pretending, and no covering up. The paradox is that only when we become completely vulnerable, do we become invulnerable because there is nothing else to figure out. Every place we feel fear it’s because there is a part of ourselves we haven’t totally integrated. As we become a fully integrated, self-realized human being, we realize we held the power all along. 

 

We are bigger, braver and kinder than we could ever imagine. Remember that. 

 

Only Love, 

 

Clara